Blessed is the morning with time to do THIS and barely a thought in mind..I'm re-arranging skeletons in my closet, its getting crowded in there..I shouldn't be left alone with myself, it'll end bad. Though nothing really ever ended bad for me, nothing really ever ended..I continue to be a stranger in my own life, playing up to men that have always defined me, I can stage my life by them. And if there's more to me than my men, why can't I be content with just me for more than a day ?..Lower expectations bring about certain comfort yet I inevitably get restless. Here's a thought -- maybe I don't exist at all. And what I really am is a reflection of whomever happens to fall into my life at the moment. Always too eager to loose my self in someone. Until all of me starts rejecting the very intrusion I so welcomed. So maybe I'm all gone, spent. The one thing in my life I haven't questioned is loving Boo, everything else is a blur.
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